Quick recap before February -
November: NOBLE & VIRTUOUS CHARACTER (SET A FIRM FOUNDATION!)
December: RELIABLE, RESPONSIBLE IN WORK; ORGANIZED, ENERGETIC, INDUSTRIOUS
January: RELIABLE, DEPENDABLE IN CHARACTER; JOYFUL, STRENGTH & HONOR ARE THEMES IN HER LIFE & SHE LOOKS FORWARD TO THE FUTURE WITH HOPE & JOY
Let's keep in mind that we are BUILDING character traits - not isolating traits by month. And I was looking over the coming year (and past months) and I noticed that there are 4 traits listed in Proverbs 31 that specifically relate to WORK.
December: RELIABLE, RESPONSIBLE IN WORK; ORGANIZED, ENERGETIC, INDUSTRIOUS
February: PLANS AHEAD, HARD WORKER, AVERTS CRISES & STRESSFUL CRUNCHES WITH WISE PREPARATION
April: SETS THE PACE AT HOME AND AT WORK, MANAGES PEOPLE AND TIME RESPONSIBLY; HER EFFORTS AND INDUSTRIOUSNESS CONTRIBUTE TO AND/OR HELP TO MANAGE THE HOUSEHOLD FINANCES
June: TAKES PRIDE IN HER WORK & HER ROLE, RECOGNIZES HER VALUE, SELF-CONFIDENT; NOT A DOORMAT - SHE IS HONORED IN HER HOME, SHE AND HER FAMILY TEACH AND MODEL LOVE AND RESPECT BY EXAMPLE
This tells me 2 things: (1) God is a fan of working women (yay!) and (2) how we work, and how we approach work are both important components of being a Godly woman. This is key to me as I feel led (sorry - Christianese there) to tailor this study to women who are single...working...preparing for marriage and children, looking for a man who recognizes/appreciates these traits, and in the meantime are striving to live each day as a Proverbs 31 woman. Not everyone reading this is single, but there are SO MANY resources out there for married women and moms - for a long time (like, the 31 years I was single?) God placed a burden on my heart to identify a roadmap for single women who were hoping to be Godly. There are many messages bombarding single women these days, many of whom are praying & hoping for the opportunity to be a Godly wife/mom but who aren't there yet. The world tells us that to get a Godly guy's attention, we need to be mysterious, sexy, independent (i.e. NOT DEPENDANT on ANYTHING - including our families, our jobs/callings, our faith, or on a prospective mate), spiritually mature, joyful, industrious, creative, and . There are awsesome books out there that speak to the Proverbs 31 "woman" - but from what I've seen, the context of that woman is that of wife and/or mother. Some good examples:
Discovering the Treasures of Godly Woman (Elizabeth George)
The Proverbs 31 Woman (Tiffany Chen)
The Excellent Wife (Martha Peace)
My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife (Sara Horn)
Princess Unaware (Brenda Garrison) - this book is actually VERY relevant to single women, the author is married with kids but she doesn't write from that perspective alone.
The fact is, these days, many of us are single women with careers & goals that include but are not limited to the roles of wife and mother. Until 2 months ago, I was more concerned with being a Godly single career woman. Now, I'm married (for 2 months now - so barely married) and I'm incorporating that role into my goals. But I have not forgotten the journey of my soul as a woman who was single & dating, working, going to school, maintaining a home, etc. There is nothing in Proverbs 31 that says a woman with these characteristics is already a wife! It says "A wife of Godly character, who can FIND?" -- in other words, the woman we're studying is an eligible bachelorette! You're a princess, a daughter of the King...as a single princess, you are learning to be these things, and the prayer is that a man worthy of you is looking for these traits in you. You do not have to -nor SHOULD you - wait until you have a partner or children to work on these traits. The principles apply if your "work" is that of a doctor, a teacher, a lawyer, an adminstrative assistant, or CPA. They apply if your current key relationships are as daughter, sister, friend, or single mother. They WORK (I think my Godly husband will agree that the main reasons he fell in love with me are my work ethic, my self-confidence, my energy, my love, my ability to express myself intelligently, and my committment to my faith - among other things). I want to move away from the assumption that God's will can only be realized in us after He's given us a partner and/or kids. In fact, I would argue that those things only complicate the endeavor -- let's learn now, as single women, or as women in dating relationships, or as women who are married without kids, how to be the WHOLE WOMAN that we're called to be in Proverbs 31.
Our noble and virtuous character flows naturally from what we know of our perfect Father, our King - as his offspring, as his princesses, we are enabled and encouraged to act as royalty. NOBLE. VIRTUOUS. Think of movies you've seen, books you've read - noble and virtuous princesses are IT! A princess is industrious (creative, proactive)...energetic (not lazy or boring)...reliable (not wishy-washy or inconsistent). She's joyful, she takes pride in who she is and what she stands for (even when TV shows and politicians and other worldly influences say that a "princess" is just a diva with pseudo-celebrity status who demands her own way & wears designer clothes). Strength and honor clothe us - we look forward to the future (including BUT NOT LIMITED TO our roles as wives and mothers) with hope and joy.
Next month I'll feature interviews with a couple of women who exemplify February's traits. They have, at their core, enthusiasm & ability to plan ahead and prepare wisely for the future. They've been this way since before they were married/mothers, and they'll confirm that they've seen RESULTS -- when they were single, planning & preparation helped them stay sane & "noble" in trying & stressful circumstances. Now that they are married, they've seen how planning and preparation blesses them mentally & also helps their households & lives run smoothly. Can't wait to share it all with you!
In the meantime...do YOU know your King? Do you know that you are not just a plain old woman on earth striving to be "better" or "happier" or "more organized?" Do you know that GOD - your Father, your King - specifically enables you to be a woman of exceptional worth? Do you know that even when your parents treat you like an irresponsible 14 year old, even when your boyfriend fails to praise your Godly attributes, even when your husband forgets to thank you for your efforts, that your King is sitting on His throne and smiling warmly as you approach him with your gifts? When the world fails to acknowledge our worth, when humans fail to recognize our growth and our contributions, God is the ONE who sees and appreciates the strides we've made toward fulfilling our call. Satisfy yourself with this knowledge: If you scheduled a meeting ahead of time with your client to address the issues you think they need help with, God is pleased. If you arrived on time to work today and gave 100% to your tasks, God is pleased. If you scheduled your day so that you could have dinner on the table tonight or lunches made ahead for next week, God is pleased. If you have a date tonight and you have decided that you will wear something modest (yet attractive) to ensure that mister-mister's mind is on your words instead of your body, God is pleased. If you can smile and say that today you KNOW Who you served....God is pleased.
But if you can't say those things, think about your relationship to your King. God calls each of us to believe SOLELY in Him - and yes, this means that you count on Him for your salvation, you count on Him to forgive your sins and redeem you so that you can be with Him in heaven when you die - but TODAY it means that you look solely to Him for your worth and validation. If you don't have a personal relationship with your Father, your King, I encourage you to pray today and ask Him to be the "Lord of your life." In simple terms, that means you're inviting Him to live in and through you, to permeate every part of you with His divine & royal attributes, enabling you to see and understand His calling in your life - PERSONALLY. If you make this committment today, and mean it, your eyes and your soul and your heart will be opened in ways you cannot even imagine. And the rewards -- oh my goodness, the rewards! Forget heaven -- I know that's just a big hypo for so many of you! - just think about the validation and the personal satisfaction to be realized TODAY - THIS WEEK - THIS YEAR - knowing that your efforts are recognized and rejoiced over by a perfect God! We seek acknowledgement from our friends, our families, our boyfriends, our husbands, our bosses. But human beings will never, ever confirm what God wants to confirm for you - that everything you do is worthwhile and meaningful! Do you want that today? Just pray this from your heart, to God:
"Lord, I know am your child - created, above all, to reflect your royal attributes and to honor & please you. Thank you for loving me and for caring every day about who I am and what I do! Please live in my heart and my soul, and help me to discern what you want me to do. Thank you for giving me the Bible, your instruction book - help me to understand it and apply it to my life. I want to live my life for you and spend forever with you in heaven."
Now you're on your way to "getting it." Forget what other people say or don't say - they're just human beings. God is the one we serve, and He's given us a book full of love letters, illustrations, stories, and applications to enable us to be PRINCESSES. Let's go, girls!
And just for the record...it took me an embarassingly LONG TIME to recognize whose validation I was seeking. I spent most of my twenties seeking the approval of friends, family, and most of all MEN - I knew that I wanted to be a wife/partner, but I fell for the lies I was letting myself believe - that a woman of worth was a woman who appeared to have it all together, who had a great body & who was independent ( which I interpreted to mean not dependant on ANYTHING - including God's standards) and who was not emotionally needy (which I interpreted to mean not needy in any way - of another person's input, of God's input, ANYTHING). It took me a long time to realize that God's way is best, and that other people are doing the best they can to learn the same thing. This is a no-judgment zone, but I encourage you to learn now, before experiencing immeasurable heartache and pain, that God's way IS the most fulfilling way - and that looking to Him alone for validation and approval is the only way that we as women will experience the peace & fulfillment we seek.
xoxo
C
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